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Sunday, April 29, 2007

Jennifer Needs...

A meme too good to pass up! Lifted from Mary Ann. Here's how to do it:

Go to Google and write your name and the word ‘needs’, in quotes — as in “Jennifer needs.” Find the first 10 "logical" sentences that come up. Here’s what i got:

Jennifer needs a cold shower (I don't like them so much. More a boy thing.) Response: So glad the original author added the part in parentheses, as I would have had to take the time to write out the same explanation. I *think* I know what this is implying, and to that end – no, I do not need a cold shower, thank you.

Jennifer needs a smack daddy. Response: I am unfamiliar with this term. I have heard of a mack daddy, and I have heard of, though not tried, smack (heroin?). I am assuming in my urban speak naiveté that this means I need a “sex buddy.” Thank you for your concern, but I am well taken care of in that department (remember? no cold showers here)

Jennifer needs heavy visual depiction of her subject. Response: This is very true. Words alone usually do not cut it for me.

Jennifer Needs Help! Response: Duh – this goes without saying!

Jennifer needs to be thankful for being discovered, she was discovered on American Idol not Burger King. Response: Yes, thank you all for showing your love for me on American Idol. I was getting tired of belting it out at the B.K. hoping one day I would land a recording deal. Though I do miss all the free chicken fries…

Jennifer needs to leave some mystery in her life...Not let it read on the front pages everytime she farts. Response: I have tried to tell the media that nobody cares about my IBS, but they don’t listen, and thus you must read nearly daily about my flatulence. I’m sorry!!!

Jennifer needs to say away from Hope, Hope must have caught what Bo has, because she believes the zombie eyed loser over Jack. Response: I could only hope for a life so interesting and complicated. Without the threat of communicable diseases, naturally.

Jennifer needs your help again. Response: I’m sorry – apparently I’m a needy kind of gal!

Jennifer needs to spend that money on new shoes, have you seen the latest busted tennis shoes she wears. Response: I thought this was the style? Ok – heading out to buy some new sneaks to avoid future embarrassment…

Jennifer needs to build a bridge & get over her river of tears she has cried. Response: Oh God – how did they know? I guess that part came after the headline about my gas. Thank you for cutting through all the crap (pun intended) to find the lonely, sad girl underneath. You guys are great…

So so fun! Thank you, Jennifers Aniston, Hudson, Garner, and Rose Horton Deveraux (DOOL) for providing our shared name with such an interesting bunch of needs!

Please play along!

6 comments:

Christy said...

Very funny! I got tagged for this meme and apparently I'm a bit needy too! Oh, and I also need new shoes. : )

MaryAnn said...

LMAO! Oh my gosh - you are the funniest! I am loving your responses!

Rebecca said...

LOL! This totally cracked me up. I must do this NOW.

eviedee said...

You are hilarious! :) Clever, clever!

Coleen said...

Awesome! I have so many posts i need to write, and now I have one more to add to the list! hope you're having a wonderful spring!

Jennifer said...

That is SOO funny and since I am also Jennifer don't have to look it up for myself :O